Becoming Unnerved

I wrote back in August, as I started my senior year, that I needed to be unnerved. I had been inspired by the film adaptation of one of my favorite books, Eat Pray Love, and I really felt that because my senior year was going to be so different from previous ones that I had to push myself out of my comfort zone.

Well, it's been a long and winding road. Without the instant support network of my synchronized skating teammates to fall back on, I spent the first part of the semester feeling incredibly alone. Sure, I had my roommates and my boyfriend was only an hour away in Cincinnati - but I didn't have my "thing" anymore. I didn't have a creative outlet, I didn't have a place where I could go and be a completely different person than I was in the classroom. And that was the beginning of becoming unnerved.

Other ways in which I continued unnerving myself include:

-getting an on-campus job
-running a 5k; continuing to train for a 10k
-participating in class
-taking initiative with professors
-writing Op/Ed pieces for the Miami Student newspaper, without hiding my beliefs, despite being a small liberal fish in a big conservative pond
-applying for post-grad jobs
-completing the interview process for CityYear Milwaukee - and getting an offer

This last one is something that I feel very strongly about, and have had several debates with myself and with others about whether or not tutoring/mentoring kids for 10 months in a city with the 4th-lowest graduation rate in the country was worth the biweekly stipend we receive to cover room and board. Trying to explain that I wasn't doing it for the money, but for the experience, really helped me to discover WHY I wanted to do it so badly in the first place. I'm so excited about being a part of something that has both short-term and long-term benefits, both for myself and for others.

I suggest doing something to unnerve yourself. You never know where it will take you - physically, emotionally, or geographically. It's awesome.

A Generation of Change, Growth

I recently did a group presentation in one of my international studies classes about Peak Oil. Proponents of the Peak Oil theory say we achieved the highest oil production in 1970. After 1970, oil became (and is still) harder to find, leading to offshore drilling in places like the Gulf of Mexico, Brazil and Africa. Good relations with the countries in the Persian Gulf became increasingly important, as they have the largest oil reserves. This topic got me thinking about the future of our generation. Our world is running out of easily accessible oil and we have not developed adequate alternative energy to replace oil as the main fuel source. How will we handle this responsibility that will fall squarely on our shoulders? We need to be catalysts of change.

I want to think positive, I want to believe we will rise above the predictions that we will be the first generation to be less well off than our parents. I want to believe we will be the pioneers of energy alternatives that actually work. Growing up during the shift from the prosperous 90s to the beleaguered 2000s should inspire us to work harder and not expect someone else to fix things for us. Insert Jimmy Carter's malaise speech here. In my opinion, the surge in gas prices in 2008 should have been the perfect thing to shock us into changing. People were driving for necessity instead of convenience. According to a CNN survey, SUV and truck sales, many of which get as little as 12 miles to the gallon in the city, dropped 25 percent in 2008. The general public noticed an increase in advertising campaigns with the words green or recycled in them.

There is still a high concentration of the latter, but after gas prices went back down at the beginning of 2009, SUV and truck sales picked back up, and those beasts are back on the roads. In the long run, it might have been better if gas prices had stayed outrageously high because it would have had a more lasting effect on our generation, the way the Great Depression affected our grandparents' generation. They always push us to finish all of the food on our plates or to only get new clothes or shoes when we really need them.

If our grandparents belonged to the greatest generation because of their ability to come back from adversity and if our parents' generation is characterized by rebellion caused at least in part by the Vietnam War, what will define us when future generations look back? Our parents' generation remembers exactly where they were when JFK was assassinated. We remember where we were Sept. 11, 2001. Our parents remember the Vietnam War, we will remember the wars in the Middle East. We will be affected by the economic downturn, which has followed us into adulthood. We are constantly reminded of our economic malaise every time we hear Jay Sean's lyric "And honestly, I'm down like the economy."
Let's hope we rise to the challenge of our generation and learn from past mistakes. Without a secure fuel source, we cannot do anything. We need to expend more resources on research of alternative fuels rather than alternative ways to drill for oil and be more conscious about cutting back on our fuel consumption.
John Mayer observed "one day our generation is gonna rule the population and we keep on waiting for the world to change." We need to stop waiting.

Jetsetter, StudentUniverse

Attention, Travelophiles!

Hillaire Billock once said, “We wander for distraction, but we travel for fulfillment”. I agree whole-heartedly with this statement, and would venture to say that aside from requirement, this is the reason many students choose to study abroad during their time in college. At first, it’s all a whirlwind of excitement, choosing where to go, which courses to take, meeting other people who are going with you – but then the reality of shelling out the big bucks for airfare hits you. Then, all those places you want to visit over there via train? More money. The hostels you’ll stay in while visiting said places? Even more money. Paying for coffee, meals, and any other miscellaneous things? Forget it. Fortunately, there is a way to keep costs down.

Since beginning college four years ago, I have been turned on to several “student-friendly” travel outlets. Studentuniverse.com is perhaps the most well-known. They have been in operation for nearly 10 years, providing student discounts on airfares (with greater discounts for groups of 12 or more), hotels and hostels, rail passes, rental cars, and travel insurance. They recently expanded their target market to faculty, recent graduates and students aged 18-25. Their search engine provides travel date flexibility for up to three days. It is also worth checking out the GoingGlobal section of the StudentUniverse website, as they offer extremely interesting travel blogs by StudentUniverse staff members, hostel guides, and helpful travel tips related to every aspect of your trip, including space-saving while packing, cutting time at the airport, and ways to not look like a tourist when abroad.

To those who do not have study abroad plans on the horizon, but your travel dreams are bigger than your travel budget, Jetsetter.com may be the answer. Jetsetter is a branch of Gilt Groupe, Inc., the site offering discounts on high-end fashion. Jetsetter follows a similar blueprint, offering discounts on luxury hotels, cruises, and tours, some in popular tourist destinations, but many in places one would never think of. “It tempts you to visit places you never intended to, or were too financially strapped to consider,” The Washington Post states. A customer could select a destination anywhere from The Greenbrier, a luxury resort in the West Virginia mountains, to a sprawling waterfront property in Sri Lanka. “Jetsetter [is] more focused on discovery and experience,” CEO David Patterson commented, “we’re looking for something distinctive and memorable.”

The site also caters to those with a competitive side, due to the time constraints on offers for seeming once-in-a-lifetime travel opportunities. The sales typically last for five to seven days, and customers can hold a trip for 10% of the cost for 72 hours. The deposit can be used for that trip, or saved for a different getaway later in the year. For any given on-sale destination, Jetsetter provides several photographs and descriptions of rooms available, plus a calendar of available dates, many times for several months out.

When Jetsetter first launched, many were skeptical that the attractiveness of 30-40% off a trip to a luxury destination would cloud customers’ judgment. They could be fooled into paying a seemingly less price, when another discount travel site offered the same trip for an actual lower fee. However, this does not seem to be the case with Jetsetter – NY Times writer Michelle Higgins found that in an albeit not-so-scientific check of several private sales, those sites beat prices offered by places Expedia.com or Orbitz.com. One of the caveats of Jetsetter, though, is that it is a community accessible through invitation from a current member, or by putting your e-mail on a membership waiting list. However, a Google search for “Jetsetter + private sale + invite” yielded a site that provided Jetsetter and Gilt Groupe invitations.

Think of the savings to be had when combining a flight purchased from StudentUniverse and a hotel from Jetsetter! I suggest, when checking these sites out, to sign up for e-mail alerts about the cheapest flight options or upcoming destination sales to get a leg up on the travel competition. Veni, vidi, servi.

Act IV, Scene I

Miami University football game, Sept. 15, 2007



For the last time, I make the schlep back to small-town Oxford, Ohio. This time, not with a car, but on a plane, and not with parents, but on my own. With help from Kyle. For the last time, I compulsively check my class rosters online, and see what books I need to spend my life savings on. I won't say this is the last time I will say goodbye to New York. I won't even say this is the last time I leave New York to go to Ohio. I can't help but hear the lyrics from "Maybe This Time" echo in my head. Senior year, here goes.

I can't help but note the significant changes that this year is pregnant with - I am sans boyfriend, best friend, and sans skating. I have wrestled with these changes all summer. For whatever reason, watching some of the most important people in my life walk across that stage and receive their rightfully earned diploma didn't hit me immediately (quite possibly because I was simultaneously fending off a 48-hour stomach flu). It took little hints, signs, and conversations before I felt the effects. You never know what you've got 'til it's gone. I truly understand this now.

I have spent the past three years of college feeling as though I'm floating. Floating to skating practice, to class, to the weight room, to my humble off-campus abode, to bed, only to get up and repeat the floating process the next day. Of course, there have been classes I have absolutely loved, and thus had perfect attendance, and those I absolutely loathed, and thus tried to come up with an excuse to miss as many as possible without failing. I have been affected by films, and guest lecturers, I have engaged in conversations with professors about life and diversity. I have laughed. I have cried. I have pulled all-nighters. I have spent $500 in coffee at the library. I have pored over maps and scholarly geographic journals. But have I found my passion? Have I found THE answer (or, at least, an acceptable one) to the perpetual question that follows around college seniors: 'What are you going to do after graduation?' This question is MUCH less fun to answer than, "what do you want to be when you grow up?", I have found.

To be blunt, I have no idea. Graduate school is on my radar, but not for a while. What's the sense in devoting yourself (not to mention your bank account) to something you are not 100% passionate about? I simply do not see the sense in it. At this moment, I would absolutely love to go to a lesser-known part of the world (a.k.a. not Western Europe, as much as I love it) and teach English. I heard a quote in the movie, "Eat, Pray, Love" last night that put my feelings about this into words perfectly: "I need to be unnerved." I have constantly questioned my abilities to teach, to coach, to lead. After captaining a varsity skating team, and coaching and caring for 20something children at 2 years of summer camp, I feel somewhat better, but by no means fully confident. But I NEED to be taken out of my comfort zone. Simply, I need to be unnerved.

I am invincible...as long as I've got coffee

cappuccino...perfetto.

The coffee shop is a unique place. All walks of life come together here, I notice. The studious college student, poring over Greek philosophy, the young businessman, with a cell phone AND a blackberry, a yellow legal pad, another important-looking book, and two cups of coffee - I initially thought he was here with someone, until he started jabbering away on his phone while scrolling through his e-mail on his blackberry. On my far right, a rugged, middle-aged man reads a large, hardcover coffee table book. Perhaps he’s a father who still goes running and hiking. To his right, a tall, thin, blandly dressed woman reads the New York Times; her hair is pulled back into a neat ponytail, with reading glasses perched perfectly on her tiny nose. As I crack my back in my seat (a nervous habit of mine, but is also useful for stealing glances), I try to see if she's got a ring on her left ring finger – I can't tell. One of the Lookout Joe workers, a girl in her 20s with long, strawberry blonde hair, comes over to sit with a man -- most likely a regular. They read the Cincinnati enquirer and discuss something I can't hear. Ah, the young business professional is gone. The middle-aged woman is not wearing a ring. Curious. The iPhone-holding, outdoorsy father in the corner gives me a smile as he resumes his position on the overstuffed couch. I glance out the window and watch the traffic, both pedestrian and automotive, rush by Mt. Lookout Square. I wonder if I could live here.

I suppose you could say I'm doing a trial run of just that - staying with Kyle and his roommate for 10 days or so in an apartment not far from this little cafe where I've set up camp should give me an idea. Especially since work doesn't start for another week, I'll have plenty of time to explore while Kyle is at the Cincinnati EPA office.

Oh! How unobservant I have been while losing myself in my thoughts! I have completely missed a new wave of customers; along with the fact that the smiling, outdoorsy father has extremely toned calves, wears the same Keen sandals my own father back in New York wears, and is sporting a black "Outdoor World" t-shirt. Oh, and it's raining outside.

I mindlessly flip through my new "Everything About Learning Portuguese" book, and watch a mom come in with her daughter and son, looking like they just came from soccer practice. They seem happy together; the daughter and son do not quarrel, do not talk back to their mother who has so generously bought them blended coffee beverages and bagels. Ah, my mysterious un-ringed middle aged woman moves to a table outside - I can't blame her, it is a bit crowded in here now.

You had me at 'hello'.

A couple embracing in St. Mark's Square, Venezia, Italy

I've always equated this expression with other cliches such as "love at first sight" or "from the moment I saw you, I knew..." My cynical self always wondered how could someone know something like that without knowing anything about the person?

It seems, though, that no one really describes their relationship as a product of one of these cliches until they've been in the relationship for a while, so how do we outsiders know that he "had her at hello"? There is obviously some initial physical attraction, plus an element of mystery and a witty comment or two that make you want to know and hear more. Commence, love.

Speaking of love. In lieu of recent events this weekend, it would be hard to not question the existence of such a complex concept as love. How do you tell someone that love really does exist after she's been cheated on by a long-term boyfriend/possible fiance? When the divorce rate in this country is upwards of 50%? I think even the most optimistic of people would have difficulty making that argument. But I am drawn to the flip side as well: if there truly is no such thing as love, what are all these musicians writing and singing about (aside from sex, drugs, and alcohol)? What have millions of movies been based on? If there is nothing to debate, why have we been debating about love for ages?

People ask: how do you know if you're in love? The most common response is - "you just...KNOW." For people who think primarily in black and white, no gray area, this is a maddening answer, because there must be some concrete constant from one couple in love to another. It's probably equally as annoying for people who see gray areas as well. Is love different across cultures? Countries? Gay vs. heterosexual couples? Is it really just a chemical reaction in your brain of dopamine, norepinephrine and phenylethylamine?

I realize that I am not the first nor the last to pose these questions, but, as previously mentioned, the events of the weekend combined with my new relationship have brought certain things to the front of my mind. The fact that these thoughts have made me feel like I've had 18 red bulls and 7 cups of coffee is another matter entirely.

The butterflies are passive aggressive and put their problems on the shelf but they're beautiful. -- Ben Kweller

amore per sempre,
mers.

Every limbo boy and girl...

Lakeside in Neuchatel, Switzerland

Ciao tutti! It's been a while. With 3.5 weeks left of my junior year, you'd think school work would also start to taper off - of course, this is not how life really works, and I still have a international economics group research paper, two italian 300-word essays, a history paper, several labs, another economics exam...oh, and THEN a week of finals.

It may sound like I'm complaining, but oddly this is the part of the semester I enjoy the most. The skating season came to a close at the beginning of March, spring break served as an excellent midway break, and now I can truly, fully immerse myself into what are the most interesting classes I've taken here at Miami.

Now when I say the skating season ended in early March, this is a blanket statement, as we have still been having 3-4 practices a week, full weights, and one day in the dance studio. Individual skills, interval aerobic training, and making sure our programs fit in the confines of the ice show curtain. It's been a loooong post-season, let's just leave it at that.